ManiacalTyrant

._.

More this here.

We have ScrubbyMcNoob an above average MGOer. He has a nice shot and good awareness. Knows what to do and what not to do. His skill setup is Assault Rifle 1, Runner 2, Monomania 3/Quarterback 3. In combat he doesn’t spray in long range battles and uses short burst to controll recoil.
He has mastered boxing, aiming while dodging and most of his kills come from the first few shots he lets off to the head. In his mind the only good player is one who runs into fire, dodges all incoming shots, and kills them on the reload. He loaths players who use any weapon skills above level 1, use cover (walls, cars, sandbags) and thinks spraying is ‘cheap’.

McNoob was playing a random Capture game one day when he ran into “xXxRandomSnake#####WithFancyLettersxXx”. This guy was ripping it up, getting double and triple kills. Then McNoob and Snake met up in the basement middle and have a firefight. McNoob dies form a headshot, and on the killcam he sees that Snake reloads instantaneously.

“FU AR 3 Noob” pops up in the chatbox soon after McNoob repawns. He shakes it off and kills a few people, on his way for the target. Suddenly a hail of bullets comes flying at him and he boxes and dances around looking for his target.

xXxRandomSnake#####WithFancyLettersxXx Killed(Headshot) ScrubbyMcnoob (M4Custom)

The killcam shows Snake behind one of the many pillars reloading his M4 then taking out anothr player not aware of his location.

McNoob’s jaw drops. His hands feverishly type “OMG U WALL HUGGING SPRAYING NOOB!!!!11!!11″ with all his anger. Now he had a vendetta. He must KILL this generic named, AR3 using noob at all cost.

He killed everyone in his way, eyes filled with rage only to be brought down every time from Snake’s M4.

The game soon came down to wire, with both players on the top of their respected teams. The cap clock was at 5-5 and both targets were down. 

“If I get the target and get the goal, I’ll be number one! I’ll show that AR 3, wallhugging noob who’s beast!”

xXxRandomSnake#####WithFancyLettersxXx has grabbed your target! Get it back!

“Oh no you don’t noob! I’ll stop you!” he yells at the TV. Running to the score point he sees that target was within his grasp! Snake turns the corner and meets up with McNoob. Their eyes meet for what seems like forever, for this is what it was down to.

Pew! Pew! 
Buurrrrrtatatatatatatat!
Pew! Pew!

They clashed, shooting and dodging bullets. Snake inched closed to the goal. McNoob boxes, then suddenly his dualshock 3 rumbbles with intense fury. 

“What the… AUTO-AIM?!?!?!?!?” He screams as his heath dwindles down to zero.

5,4,3…

“No, this can’t be happening…”

2…

1…

Red Team wins!

Enraged, McNoob hasty grabs his keyboard. “The only reason you won is because you AA you noob!!! You need to git gud like me feg snake!!!!”

Snake replies “good game”.

Then McNoob quits, turning off his PS3 and goes to GameFAQs and makes a rage topic:

“All ppl who use AR3 are noobz!!!111!!one!!!!”

And that children, is how AR3 became noobish.

Click here, since embedding was disabled.

Note to self: Don’t eat poisonous food. 

Ever wanted to play MGO, but you’re afraid people will laugh at your silly UNORIGINAL names? Well, I’m here to help all the noobs choose the most awesome and intimidating name possible. When people see you they will definitely think “wow, this guy MUST be good” before even seeing how you play. Okay, first things first: If you’re not very creative you can always just put your own spin on one of the following names.

Solid Snake
Liquid Snake
Solidus Snake
Liquid Ocelot
Sniper Wolf
Grey Fox
Boss 
Big Boss

Slap a number on it ! (ex Solid Snake789 or Big Boss673) 

- Nevermind the fact that there are literally thousands of players with names just like these; thats a minor detail. If your number doesn’t work, just add another number to your number and BAM! Now, you’re the one and only Liquid_Ocelot_876175981! Of course, you can also use cool symbols, underscores, and other miscellany to your name: for example, xXx_~SÕL!d_-_sNÅkè~_xXx! Think of the POSSIBILITIES! 

Okay, now the ‘fun’ part! Time to let your CREATIVE juices flow! The secret to a great name is starting with a adjective then ending with a metal gear themed “code name”. (Again pay no attention to the insane amount of people with names just like these…I assure you, you are CREATIVE and ORIGINAL. Choose from the list on the left then match it with any word from the right and BINGO! You now have an ORIGINAL and intimidating name.

Deadly + Hound
Sneaky + Wolf
Crazy + Fox
Blood + Boss
Death + Snake
Liquid + Raven
Solid + Mantis
Solidus + Sniper

Theres many more these are just a few examples….

And lastly…bring you real life name into MGO! Just put any of the MGS themed code name with your real name and BANGO! Now you can be just like “Solid Steve” or “Biggest Boss Larry”!

The best part is that you can use this ‘guide’ for ALL online games. Just replace the names and related stuff with the equivalent of said online game. (ex. xXx__MÆsTËr_jOhn_cHiÊf_0472__xXx for Halo 3!)

(And yes, I haven’t posted anything in a while. Shut up.)

New, for the soon-to-be-released Monster Hunter Frontier 4.0 is the ‘Lightning Wyvern’, Berukyurosu (ベルキュロス). Hopefully this monster will make an appearance in Monster Hunter 3 as well. Not much to say, except that it sorta looks like a Rathalos.

Also new to MHFO 4.0 is the map ‘Desert Canyons’. The map itself looks interesting, if not a little bit small.

Monsters to appear in this map include (from left to right) Espinas Ashyu, Tigrex, Rahjan, and Berukyurosu.

…Bustin out ur windows.

At one point, the only portable gaming system people gave a crap about was the Gameboy. But then Sony came and things got effed up. Now the contenders are the PSP and the DS. The Gameboy is like, abandoned and left crying in a corner. Both the ‘new’ systems already have had a slight facelift over the years (PSP-2000, or the PSP Slim and the DS Lite), which are both essentially the same system, only smaller/ thinner.

Recently, both companies announced (and released) the newest versions, the DSi and the PSP-3000. I don’t own either, but they both look pretty lame to me, so far.

The PSP-3000 has minimal changes, the most prominent being the ‘new LCD screen’, where it’s supposed to be brighter and stuff. I also gets a built-in microphone (similar to the DS), for reasons of turning the PSP into a ‘viable communications device’. I hope that means the PSP’ll have a phone function or something. They also changed the ‘home’ button to a ‘PS’ button, like the PS3.

So, the PSP-3000 is basically the same as the same as the PSP-2000. However, one thing that irks me is the ‘1000′ gimmick. Why is it the 3000? It’s not it’s like one of those stereotyped sci-fi machines. And it definitely doesn’t have 2999 generations before it, right? It totally does not go with the trend.

Playstation > Playstation 2 > Playstation 3. – Uh, okay. Makes sense.

PSP > PSP-2000 > PSP-3000. –  2 – 1999??? 2001 – 2999???

Moving on, the DSi is basically another update. Yada yada yada 12% thinner yada yada yada less battery consumption, whatever. The main thing is that is have 2 built-in cameras right now. One in the fold-y part of the thingie, and one of the cover. So now you can play, uh, interactive games?

Is it just me, but why in God’s name does it need 2 cameras? What, so you can film yourself and whoever’s standing in front of you? Useless extra hardware, anyone? And look, the dreaded ‘i’ makes an appearance. Which means the Devil has something to do with this now. That’s just wibbly-wobbly wonderful.

So, in general, I find these two updates lame. Why don’t they make an actually overhaul of the systems? Why are they just adding lame, unneeded gimmicks? They’re like putting the thingies on life support. That’s what they look like. On life support.

SONY: OMG WE NEEDS NEW SYSTEM SALES HAV GAWN DOWN BAI 3% OMGWTFBBQOFgsoij111!!!!!!11!!one!!1

SONY: QUICK SLAP SUM STUFF TOGETHER! NEW LCD SCREEN! MIC! YAY

NINTENDO: OMG SONY MAED A NEW THING! QUIK WE MUST PUT MORE USELESS SHIZ ON TEH DSS

Bottom line, if you don’t own any of these and you want one, get one. But if you already own a DS Lite or something, don’t waste your money on a DSi. Save that money for something else. Like a band trip.

(Hint, hint).